MICKEY: I don't doubt that many will see this differently than I do, but I'm only offering my own view as my own view, so that's fine. I fully believe that children have a genetic predisposition and God-given abilities and aptitudes - but I also believe in many respects our children are a bit of a blank canvas and whatever we do, and don't do, to a great degree informs what kind of people they will be.
While raising my own kids I have long thought that some folks make way too big a deal about some things they want to protect their kids from . . . I mean, such a big deal that what doesn't even have to be an issue at all becomes a major point of attention in the child's life. For instance, if the parent wants the child to eat healthy they will never have Coke or candy bars around, if they want the child to recognize the importance of God in their life they must be in church every Sunday and youth group every meeting, etc . . . my concern is that this kind of fixated attention can easily backfire.
I think this kind of thing frequently happens with scary movies. Certainly some images and storylines are not appropriate for certain age groups - but even if you wouldn't show your child a film with ravenous monsters and bloodied victims, it's still just a movie and shouldn't be treated as though it's something that could harm a child, like something you're protecting them from. All that kind of negative attention is absorbed by the child, they will look at scary movies as you portray them to them, something they need to be leery of, something that could harm them - rather tan just a movie they could either take or leave.
Some people can't deal with scary movies because they can't sleep without frightening images disturbing their sleep, some just don't think death and mayhem are suitable subjects for art or entertainment, etc, and that's fine with me - but some can't watch scary movies because, from their youth, they been given a notion that this kind of movie is negative, that it should be avoided, that there's something we need to be careful about, etc, and that seems too bad to me.
In my house, as my kids were growing up, we simply didn't make a big deal about scary movies. As my kids were old enough to understand story and pretend, and that there's not really a giant monster that could smash Tokyo or vampires who want to eat them, etc, they were included in whatever movie we might be watching, without fussing about how it's scary so should they or shouldn't they, etc. Simply put, we didn't make a big deal out of it so it wasn't a big deal. As adults, none of my kids can't watch a scary movie and none of them can't get enough and only watch scary movies - horror and monster movies are just another kind of movie, some are lame and some are real good, just like any other kind of movie . . . because they were treated as just any other kind of movie.
So, my advice (if anyone's asking) is, if you don't want your kids to freak-out if a scary scene comes-up in a movie, if you don't want the to have nightmares, if you don't want them to be fearful, then don't make it a big deal that they ought to be prepared to freak-out over and have nightmares - it's just a movie.
MARY: YES!!!! Now if you could just go back in time and tell the DH's parents that would be awesome. The scariest movie I've watched in 10 years since meeting Mike is The Dark Knight. Do you remember The Grudge from a few years back? He actually got up and left the room when the trailer came on TV. It's really pretty funny, a grown man with his hands over his eyes because The Joker's on the screen.
MARY: YES!!!! Now if you could just go back in time and tell the DH's parents that would be awesome. The scariest movie I've watched in 10 years since meeting Mike is The Dark Knight. Do you remember The Grudge from a few years back? He actually got up and left the room when the trailer came on TV. It's really pretty funny, a grown man with his hands over his eyes because The Joker's on the screen.
